Calm Waters

As opposed to Alexandria, these waters exuded a sense of calm when we 'met' them. And at the risk of sounding biased, I enjoy these pictures more than Alexandria. The emotions one feels when looking at them are less like that of a rampaging boar's ;)

This is a shot of the Red Sea, that time we visited Egypt. It was taken right before we went snorkelling. I love the different shades of blue, showing the different depths and the possibility of corals. It was also the only time I've seen dolphins, albeit from far, but I DID see them nonetheless. 

And this is of the Nile, the marshy parts of it. I posted a similar picture here.

Another of the Nile, my favourite one by far. This shot was taken mere moments before the previous picture.

 

My last picture on Egyptian waters, ok? :) This is a shot out of a window of the hotel we stayed in, in Cairo. Reminded me of a jetty at home except that our port cities don't usually have such tall buildings that are visible here  in the background.

This is the beachside in Evpatoria, also bordering on the Black Sea which I mentioned when I talked about the Bear Mountain (Medved Gara). We went here for a weekend two years back - I think. Look closely enough and you might spot a ship on the far horizon. Oh, and the water was freezing!! (Maybe that was because we went there towards the ending of autumn, being the heroes that we are :p)

And this deep blue is of my home. It's off the east coast of Peninsular Malaysia. The convoy of fishing boats you can see is a norm. The fishermen go out together for safety from the weather, and pirates... Aaarrr! :)

except real life pirates aren't this cute :)

Getting Married is

…plain weird. Please excuse me if it comes out wrong, k? :)

My stand on marriage : PRO marriage

My stand on weddings: WEIRD un-understandable series of events

First is the measured writing out of wedding cards and reception invites, which depends on my mum’s inarguably very lengthy list of relatives and friends of relatives – most of whom I’d never known 6-7 years before this! After all the weddings she’s pulled off, her list is the only reference some of my aunts require! Not kidding.. I like the card-writing part because as I’ve mentioned here, I appreciate routine at times :)

But of course before that there’s the family haggling of possible venues of the said events… and what alcohol may/may not be served ;)

After the cards and late evening phone calls cum visits to close family/friends for  personal invitations to the endless ceremonies (trust me, in my family, the ceremonies begin a week BEFORE and extend to a few weeks AFTER the wedding itself – at a minimum! :P), there are:

1. Caterers -  Coz EVERY ceremony has food involved

2. Decorators - Think fairy lights, floral arrangements, garlands, kumbam, kolam,water features and ice
sculptures

3. Bridal schools - For the bride. But just as importantly for family members (mum, sis,cousins, dads, bros,the 
neighbour’s neighbour…!)

4. Photographers - But sometimes the decorators supply one and I like that. It saves time

Then there’s shopping. This part, I DON’T like. I don’t mind shopping, but I detest shopping for clothes and especially for others. I always end up feeling like crap at the cashier. Plus, I’m pretty clueless when it comes to sarees and veshtis. I wouldn’t know a kanchipuram silk from Egyptian cotton. Thank God for aunts, huh? Did I really just say that?? Eeek!

But I do love the late night gambling sessions, the sweetmeats in shiny tins in kitchen cupboards, the aroma of yummies wafting out in the warm wind into my yard as I open the front gate. The little frowns as family members recall another errand they forgot while worrisome is actually pleasant in a twisted way. It means they care about doing things right.

I also like the packing of door gifts with cousins just before we crash on a mattress in the hall, giggling and making small talk before we drift off to sleep. I don’t mind too much waking up to find all my blankets bunched up under one of their bums and having to do more work the next day.  Actually I DO mind waking up without a blanket. Note to self: Kill next cousin/sibling who steals blanket in the middle of the night.

I enjoy the mad dash to the wedding hall with the wedding trays and being part of the bride/groom’s entourage, but I DON’T enjoy the length of the ceremony. Hindu weddings are notoriously long and the worst of the lot are Ceylonese Hindu weddings. It takes 2 hours plus. One best man (he sits next to the groom while waiting for the bride) actually nodded off to sleep! No, I aint tellin’ who ;)

I am usually tired out by this time but the drive to the bride’s house then the groom’s within the ‘auspicious’ period while confusing to some, usually makes me smile. But I usually smile when I don’t understand something so don’t read too much into it :)

And I totally love the after-wedding meals that the brides and grooms get. That’s the stuff envy is made out of! Then the MARRIAGE begins…

 

You see, weddings are mere culturosymbolic ceremonies, officiated by a clergyman usually. Marriage, however, is what happens AFTER the ceremony. It’s living. Living with someone else, understanding their quirks and personal idiosyncrasies and them knowing yours. It’s putting up with each other and sometimes wondering how you lived without the other, sometimes wondering how you manage to live with them thus far too!

So many of my relatives and friends are taking that leap of faith and I wish I could be there at these times. Since I’m waaay over here, I just wanna wish them a perfect joyful wedding and a wondrous marriage where they learn to love each other and help one another grow over the years.

That’s why I never get why storybooks and movies end with a kiss at a wedding ceremony. I mean, isn’t that only the beginning?

P/s : Take it from someone who’s been a part of a gazillion weddings - don’t get stressed if the caterer forgets matching coloured scallops for the tables or you don’t get a picture with your best friend’s mum. Remember the wedding is a ceremony and just smile. Ok? :)

It’s the marriage which counts, everyone else will forget the wedding. Really. 

Plus getting stressed will ruin your mood and make you look like a lunatic in your wedding photos.

And no, I haven’t been part of a gazillion weddings but it sure feels like it :) AND I dunno how many zeros there are in a gazillion. Do you?? 

Earth

It took me some time to admit that this place could be almost as good as home. These helped over the years:

We moved in, four unknown people who had nothing whatsoever in common with each other, except for love of the seat on the windowsill which overlooked this bit of earth. As crammed up as it may seem, the tops of the green firs had us smiling and chattering away, nursing mugs of steaming chai (tea). We had black tea, green tea, milk tea, fruity tea, hibiscus tea, camomile tea, earlgrey tea, english breakfast tea, Turkish tea,tea with lemon slices.... you name it, and we might have tried it.

Weirdly (or maybe not) a lot of the tea here comes from Ceylon and India. And the coffee mixes from Indonesia and Brazil. Did I hear you say globalisation? ;)

Do you see the rocky peninsular-ish outcrop? That's Medved Gara. Medved means bear and Gara means mountain. Apparently an enormous bear wandered the Earth long ago and finally felt such an unquenchable thirst that he had to stop for a drink. And he happened to be by the Black Sea, just on the outskirts of Port Yalta. Well, he bent over, bum in the air and all, and began drinking from the saltiest sea in the world. No wonder his thirst has not been quenched yet!

He was still there a few months back when I took this picture :)

And my last picture for today is of the mountains and gentle rolling hills leading to the Red Caves, so named, for their rusty colour (high iron deposits). The Red Caves area has a beautiful waterfall and little gurgling brooks and streams surrounded by lush greenery and tree saplings. We had to walk an hour from the marshutka (shuttle-van/public bus?) stop to get there, but it was worth it.

The Red Caves are unadulterated and peaceful, a perfect place to be after a crazy schedule.We enjoyed the hike up the hills and the slipping and splashing along the cold cold cold stream beds very much!

************************ 

It's funny how we worked so hard during school, A-levels and the equivalents to get an education here, away from home, then now we work so hard to get back home. Maybe it's got something to do with where the heart is? ;)

Whatever it is, the earth here may be beautiful, but my motivation to do better each day is for my bit of earth halfway around the globe, somewhere along the Equator.

Home. That's. Where. I. Want. To. Be. :)

Woopsie. I hope KFC doesn't sue me for plagiarising their catchphrase :S

On Children.Not A Happy Post

          Kids are time consuming, nerve wrecking and totally unpredictable. Even more so when they aren't our own!You would think that they'd be less complex because they are essentially miniature versions of us, no? But after our third posting at the department, the little stethoscope-demanding gremlins seem to have grown on us.

          All that said and done, I still fail to get why people have kids and then throw them aside.  

Case 1: Beautiful woman with gorgeous eyes talks to us. Educated, confident, Orthodox Christian. Then we walk into the procedure room later and there she is, getting a D&C (abortion) Unwanted pregnancy? Use protection, dammit. Not like you live in a Muslim country without sex-ed, yeah?

Case 2: Well-to-do couple, stable home. When we met their child (then 5 months plus), they were nowhere in sight and had stopped visiting the child when he was 1 month old. Why? Coz he was born with microcephalia (small skull and brain) Yes, death is imminent for a child in that condition but he was still their child. He still needed their love. We just learnt that he passed away a few weeks back. I doubt anyone claimed his body. Please do say a prayer for him.

Case 3: It happens ALL the time at home and I'm getting bloody sick of it. Woman (in most cases it's a GIRL, not a WOMAN) has kid, wraps it (or doesn't) and hides baby in bushes/toilet/whatever place she thinks is safe. Whatever place she thinks is safe, is NOT. The kid will probably be hungry/ suffer from overcooling/ get an infection/ be bitten by insects/ be afraid. Yes, newborns can feel fear. These 'mothers' never hand in the child to welfare/ the police because they fear the potential social stigma. Cow dung, if you ask me.

Case 4: Abuse. We hear about abuse in the name of God (like God would tell you to burn the kid with incense or whip him till he bleeds?), in parental conflict, in poverty/after drug or alcohol consumption. I freaking hate it. I've even met with a mum who made her kids drink paraquat (weedkiller) after some problems with her spouse. How are we supposed to be IMPARTIAL and WANT to save the life of a woman who would harm innocent beings under her care? Don't get me wrong, but most child abuse cases involve the mothers or female guardians. At times I find myself cursing Hippocrates and his oath.

          I don't know why I'm writing this. It isn't going to change the fate of these kids, but it sucks to see kids like that. It's just unfair. I usually think of their shy smiles, confiding whispers, Winnie the Pooh bedspreads and little finger nails but I got a little emo after reading about the babysitter and lover who caused the death of a toddler. Inhumane.

Are women REALLY the better half? 

          Women succumb to selfish acts, give in to fear for 'social standing' and then behave like men are incapable of rational thought when in fact it is the woman who makes the FINAL decision on abortion/ abandoning the child. 

          The fact that I am even blogging against my own gender proves how wrong I feel this is. 'This' being us women smearing camel shit all over the notion of motherhood and motherliness.

          Forget breastfeeding campaigns. Teach the women how to BE women and not vile ar** wipes, for our educated women of today have forgotten the basic cave-men era lessons of loving and nurturing.

          I know the post is full of rantings and negative emotions. My apologies, but I had to get these feelings into a semblance of order. I don't function well with pent up chaotic anger, but expressed 'controlled' fury like this is more manageable :)

"God is in the face of a child "

My mum told me this once when my nephew was born. I couldn't agree with her more. 

Looking forward to more drool faces and pouty small round faces, because I think CHILDREN are the better half of the population. 

Alexandria

       The first view we got of the Mediterranean Sea, and her gathering might. Choppy waves, and chaos. That's what I initially thought.The churning froth from the heaving waters had us awestruck for where I come from, the waves are more subdued  - though no less beautiful!
       Disembarking from the van we were hit by the salty tang of the sea, and cold spittle rained on us from even 3 plus metres away. 

       Then we got closer to the water's edge. The fine spray and the way the droplets danced and shimmered as wave upon wave pounded on the cemented walls around the periphery of the city left us breathless. Breathless from her majestic power and also because we were running for cover!
Note : Running for cover was a futile attempt because we all got drenched anyway :P
       The pounding of the waves was rhythmic and almost orchestrated, and the thunder of the waves drowned out all thought from us. 

       We waited a full 2 hours and more to watch the receding waves. That platform you see in the picture above had been submerged underwater the first time we got to there. 
       We could finally hear each other speak again but none of us did much talking  for some reason.

       This was our parting shot as we left to go to the library (No, not the original library by Alexander the Great, that one got sunk long ago!) 
       I love the shoreline formed by the crests of the waves, that huge white curve upon the sand.
       I genuinely believe that if I had been an atheist, I would have succumbed to animistic beliefs after that day, for the sea truly seemed to have a soul of her own. The sea having a soul thing was much talked about after our trip, when our tongue-tied-ness had worn off, but one thing we all agreed on was this: never had any of us seen any other body of water with such character, such attitude before!
       And our translator assured us that she was like this every single day. Such immense power, it was a trifle scary. 
Yeah, we had a translator :), since the only decent word we knew collectively in Arabic was 'shukrat', which means thank you... and that wouldn't have gotten us very far!